Office Holiday Celebrations: Thanksgiving Potlucks

22 Nov

Office Survival Tip: Thanksgiving Potlucks

Office Thanksgivings are one of the best Office Holidays. It’s a time for co-workers to gather round and give thanks for the upcoming time off and general lack of productivity that settles in around the Holidays. It’s also a time to eat large quantities of lukewarm, mediocre food as part of the Office Thanksgiving Potluck tradition.

Of course as an office worker, you will be expected to contribute to the Office Thanksgiving Potluck, even if you have no interest in eating large quantities of lukewarm, mediocre food. But on the bright side, no one is really expecting anything spectacular from you in the food-making department.

I believe that food-making is best left to the experts (e.g. the Keebler elves, Colonel Sanders, Mrs. Fields, or the Bagel Bites people), but if you feel compelled to actually cook something, keep it simple, preferably something out of a box, where the only extra ingredient needed is water. This is not the time for you to try to show off your self-appointed Paula Dean cooking skills. Your made from scratch apple pie will not bring forth awe and appreciation from your co-workers. Instead you’re just going to annoy everyone else who was perfectly content half-assing things until you showed up with your painstakingly handcrafted treat. And besides, you’ll certainly rouse the ire of the Cubicle Gods who will smack you down for your pride at the next potluck when Susan brings in a triple-tiered organic pumpkin cheesecake.

Remember, the best way to sail smoothly through an Office Thanksgiving Potluck is with limited effort. If you need some ideas, the traditional Thanksgiving 2 liter of Sprite is always appreciated, and holiday themed Oreos are always a safe bet. Hell, even if you bring in a bag of cheese cubes that still beats out the guy who brought the can of yams.

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22 Responses to “Office Holiday Celebrations: Thanksgiving Potlucks”

  1. Lifes Highway (@lifeshighway) November 22, 2011 at 9:01 am #

    Extra points for cheese cubes skewered with fancy toothpicks with the decorative top. After you eat your cheese you can spend wonderfully productive minutes in your cubicle unwinding the brightly colored bits of flagging.

    • sharkables November 22, 2011 at 5:44 pm #

      That sounds almost as much fun as ripping restaurant napkins into millions of tiny pieces

  2. Ariel Driskell November 22, 2011 at 4:50 pm #

    I love this! We just had our office pot luck today and I didn’t eat anyone’s food that I didn’t personally know, unless it was store bought. And even then you take kind of a risk lol.

    • sharkables November 22, 2011 at 5:50 pm #

      Good tip, although even people you know can be deceiving… I have one horror story where I was coerced into trying giblets and gravy due to a similar train of thought.

  3. gigoli November 22, 2011 at 5:23 pm #

    I have same taxa

  4. Fred Wanner November 22, 2011 at 5:54 pm #

    We are just going to do pizza tonight. Midnight shift is a different world. Congrats on becoming Freshly Pressed.

    • sharkables November 22, 2011 at 6:06 pm #

      Enjoy the Thanksgiving festivities! At least you can order the traditional 2 liter of Sprite with that?

      Personally, I can’t say much about the nightshift since I’ve never ben on one. I have a tendency to get cranky past 9:30pm though, so it’s probably for the best.

  5. The Hook November 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm #

    This blog could save lives. my friend!

    • sharkables November 24, 2011 at 12:25 pm #

      That’d be great, I’d love my sarcasm to be a source of positive karma!

  6. mattgcon November 23, 2011 at 1:53 am #

    This goes along with the other office gala’s throughout the rest of the year. However, I feel those types of things should be left out of office hours and be considered optional.

    http://thedailystresser.wordpress.com

    • mysoulforsale November 27, 2011 at 1:21 pm #

      I totally agree with you. I make that argument on my blog constantly. Why work has been so entwined with our personal lives, I will never know, but I sure do wish that people would just bugger off and leave me out of it!

  7. blythevalleyinnovationcentre November 23, 2011 at 6:56 am #

    brilliant post again – As we are based in the UK we don’t really celebrate Thanksgiving. Some offices will hold a buffet style Christmas feast though in the office and this can be the horrific time when you are forced to try someones ‘special recipe sponge cake’. I opt for mince pies – shop brought I’m afraid.

    • sharkables November 29, 2011 at 6:28 am #

      Maybe I’m just hungry, but special recipe sponge cake sounds kind of delicious right now…but in my mind that sounds like normal sponge cake with a special aura of deliciousness…from your post, thats probably not what it is in reality

  8. Ashok Kumar November 23, 2011 at 7:56 am #

    Nice idea. This blog is going to be popular!

  9. ashazenzi November 23, 2011 at 2:37 pm #

    my co-worker bought bean dip to our last holiday party. it was sprinkled with feta. food that looks like poo is never a good idea but topping it with a completely unrelated cheese (Greek bean dip?) that looked like mold was an epic fail. needless to say that culinary contribution sat completely un-disturbed.

    • sharkables November 24, 2011 at 12:21 pm #

      Ahhh, that made me laugh. But very avant garde of him for exploring Greek/Mexican culinary fusion

  10. Gerald Anwar November 24, 2011 at 4:40 am #

    I usually think blogs are just full of rubbish but I enjoyed reading this.

  11. mysoulforsale November 27, 2011 at 1:24 pm #

    Like the commenter above, I too only consume store bought items. God only knows what the hell the morons I work with do on their personal time, but I don’t want to find out after the contents of my stomach are examined in a lab post-stomach-pumping!

    Cute post!

    • sharkables November 29, 2011 at 6:25 am #

      I’m pretty sure anything brought to a office potluck is at least 2 grades lower than what the bringer would make themselves at home. It’s kind of like playing Russian Roulette with deviled eggs…

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